01 January 2015

My Start to 2015

So.. I'm pregnant again! This time around, was not so excited. With two girls already I was very much spread thin and so the thought of another morsel running around sends a few chills down my spine. I have not really come to terms with it yet still. I am about 10 weeks now and suffering terribly from morning sickness.

I can't bare the smell of the living room with all the food smells going on that I have confined myself to my room for a few weeks now. Of course it had to hit right around Christmas. I could only barely stand being in the living room thankfully because Jun had cut up fresh fruit and the smell of pineapple cut through everything else which made it just bearable. But when he reheated some meatball leftovers, kindly made by his Mother, I had to retreat back to my room. I must say it was very hard for me to not be able to do anything over Christmas. The girls loved it though. They are still young enough to enjoy anything and everything. Reia loves the thought of Santa and the first thing she said when she woke up was, "Mummy, we open presents now?" We only bought a couple things online the week before so there was not much under the tree. Poor Jun got nothing and I wasn't expecting anything either, but of course he got me some body stuff that I can't wait to try. Reia got an AIUEO puzzle set, a new dress from her Oma and a new winter top top her Obaachan. She especially loved her Youkai Watch DVD box set! That was all she was jabbering about. Aila got some Anpanman building blocks which she loves stuffing into the dining table drawers. Jun did such a good job. He prepared the breakfast platters and cooked up a mean feed of steak, salmon, and prawns for dinner with cake and ice cream for dessert. I didn't eat anything and the girls only ate a little so he pretty much had made his meals for the next couple days. 

New Years was even more less festive. The girls fell asleep early which was expected, I was in my room watching the last few episodes of Master Chef Australia and Jun was in the living room watching the New Year tv shows. After I finished the Master Chef series, I looked at the clock and it was 12:03. I had missed the countdown completely lol. I held my breath to not smell the smells beyond my room and went to the living room to say Happy New Year to Jun and he too had lost track of time. So we welcomed the new year separately but are ok with it. There is nothing we can do about the morning sickness. We just have to wait it out. He has been doing so much for us, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the girls. I feel so useless. I can't wait to be back on my feet!

So far I have recently figured out that I can eat fresh pineapple, fruit yogurt, and chicken noodles. I try to steer away from the savoury though because throwing that up is the worst. This time around is definitely not as bad as with Aila. That was the worst 2 months of my life! I could not hold down anything and was just constantly throwing up. At one point I lost 10 kgs in 2 weeks. This time around I have lost the same, about 10 kgs but it has been over the course of a month. So still hard but at a slower rate. I have been craving foods that of course are only on the other side of the world in New Zealand or are not in season right now (but are in season in New Zealand/Australia) like plums and mangoes. I am also craving foods that aren't recommended for pregnant women. Typical. I would love a chicken roll from the bakery, a custard pie, a steak and cheese pie, lift plus, black licorice, liver pate, soft cheeses, raw fish, fresh mayo and aioli sauce with kumara chips, fish and chips, eggs benedict, sushi, a lamb doner kebab etc etc. I think it's dumb there are so many restrictions. I understand why, but I feel like it comes down to common sense. If a chicken roll has been left to sit all day on a shelf, obviously don't eat it. If it is freshly made, I see no problem. Same goes for custard pies and sushi. In Japan, pregnant women still eat raw fish. I think because it is pretty fresh and the handling standards may be slightly higher. They also eat raw egg! Licorice is bad in big amounts, but a piece or two here and there is fine. I would do anything for a big juicy red Australian mango right now! 

I am going back home to New Zealand in April and I cannot WAIT! In the state I am in now, all I can do is dream of food and wait to go home and eat it all! Lol. I need a big crisp and juicy granny smith apple!!! They don't sell those here. I need a sausage roll, butter chicken, pork belly, Whittaker's chocolate, a bundaberg, some lift, some fresh'n fruity apricot yoghurt!! That 10 kgs I lost will be back before ya know it!

One thing that I can't help but worry about is the baby. I have not been able to go to the doctors yet because I can barely walk, yet alone get out of the house. Before I knew I was pregnant, I went to the hospital for an MRI on my spleen. They found a massive cyst growing from it. To make the pictures more clear, they had to use a medicine which is not recommended for pregnant women... I had that medicine in my system while I was pregnant... I am so worried for my baby's development and scared that he or she will develop abnormally because I was not on to it enough. At that time I would have been 3 weeks, barely 4, so even if I had taken a test, it may have been too early to tell. I am just kicking myself, fearing the worst. I have prayed and prayed for my baby but I will never know until he or she is born or until she is big enough for the ultra sound to detect any abnormalities. I am hoping to get my first scan this month. Hopefully I will be well enough to get out of the house and to the doctors. Over here they use the probing method in the first few months which I hate. And the doctor is of course a man and there are nurses all on the other side of the curtain looking. I am hoping that by the time I go, I will be far along enough to start using the ultrasound machine.

That is where I am at the start of 2015! Hopefully things will start to look a bit brighter as the year progresses! Bring on April already! I am ready to go home!


  1. Happy New Year Danni. I had much the same feelings when I found out I was pregnant with Rawiri. These little spirits really love to sneak in when we least expect it! Its happened to me twice now. Looking forward to seeing you in April and I will definitely shout you a pie!

    1. Aw thanks Dani! Sure is good to know I'm not alone! Hope it's all over soon. I will see you and that pie in April ;) xoxo

  2. Dear Dani- I just visited the site and saw your comments above. You are carrying too much of the burden. I agree, you need to return home to New Zealand asap. There you will be able to regroup mentally and also have your loved ones including your wonderful sister with you to share in your tasks of bearing a child. God Bless. I know that He has already answered your prayers. and are just waiting to manifest themselves at certain points in the future. He answered my prayers after spending 2 and a half months in the hospital.